“Heaven” by David Baker
All afternoon the sprinkler ticks and sprays,
ticks and sprays in lazy rounds, trailing
a feather of mist. When I turn it off,
the cicadas keep up their own dry rain,
passing on high from limb to limb.
I don’t know what has shocked me more,
that you are gone, that I am still here,
that there is music after the end.
My green-eyed beauty, 11 years ago we said goodbye. This poem speaks so clearly to what we have lived over those 11 years. The rain was hard, the grief and mourning of your death felt like it would last forever; that the torrents of sadness and loss would never ease.
But, the Lord has “turned for me my mourning into dancing” (Psalm 30:11), there is beautiful music after the rain. Music I had never heard before. Peace I had never felt. There is joy beyond belief and as I remember you on your heavenly birthday I am no longer left with a hole in my heart that I thought would never be filled. Instead, my heart is bursting with love and awe and wonder over the beautiful baby you were and the spirit you always will be.
We love you forever and always.
Mommy, Daddy, Avery & Lily